contemplating the journey of ordination
Once a month I settle into a white sofa at my therapist’s office, and I talk through the past four years of my ordination process. Each session is highlighted usually by a certain memory that either haunts or propels me forward, and each session has become my own sacred spiritual ritual of processing and healing.
Since 2019, I faced many challenges. From a torn ACL, financial setbacks and struggles, loss of relationships, car issues, an ice storm, a tornado, the death of a loved one, a flea infestation to being a victim of fraud, an Uber accident, personal health challenges, a hit and run and well, yeah- the whole Covid19 thing. Professionally, I failed the Bible Content Exam three times, failed to advance to candidacy once, and was constantly wondering what it was about myself that made the Universe to seemingly reject this call so clearly.
Strangely, the challenges were countered by spiritually meaningful opportunities such as an Interfaith Peace Fellowship that took me to Cairo, Egypt and Carlisle, England to train with reconciliation and mediation specialists. Through my chaplaincy training at a Trauma 1 Center, I combed the hair of victims in the hospitals, caught mothers as they collapsed to the floor upon hearing their child had not survived surgery, witnessed CPRs and pronouncements of deaths and celebrations of births. It was four years of the highest of highs and the lowest of lows.
I promised myself one thing though, and that was that regardless of the journey, I would see myself through to the finish line of ordination. It was with gratitude that I was offered the Dickson Pastoral Residency at St. Charles Avenue Presbyterian Church as a space where I could work in ministry while also studying and finishing up the requirements to be an ordained Presbyterian minister. Coming to New Orleans has been a profoundly healing experience for me, with the Holy Spirit using each member of the St. Charles Avenue Presbyterian Church as a healing balm for my exhausted spirit.
For me, ordination was not simply a spiritual pilgrimage, but more a spiritual battle. And on May 19th at 4:00 p.m., the Presbytery of South Louisiana will be congregating at our church to celebrate my ordination alongside all of you in a special worship service. Bring your sons and daughters to the service so that they can witness a woman being ordained. Perhaps it will plant a seed in their hearts to serve the church as they grow up, and to advocate for the amplification of voices that have been oppressed by history and fear. Perhaps it will help them speak up when they hear harmful words against women when they inevitably will in the future.
Let this ordination service serve each of you as an illumination of your own vocation to serve the church and one another, because we need you. Your spiritual pilgrimage begins the moment you decide to answer the purpose God has placed on your heart. Have courage and shine bright.